Humor District

This week we present to you a Friday Feature, we’ve teamed up with MrSkin to provide you dudes with the latest in babe news. MrSkin, if you never saw the movie Knocked Up or are not into these types of sites, is the world’s most trusted source for nude celebs in movies and TV. They specialize in locating, rating, and posting instances of nudity in television and film. Skipping to the good parts if it were.

This week, Kelly MacDonald from Harry Potter, Sasha Grey in Entourage, and Exorcist babe Linda Blair in Chained Heat. Watch the video below.

2010 has drawn to a close and many of us are still optimistic about our lists of resolutions. This is because a new year brings with it new possibilities and new hope. This year we will finally be able to shed those unwanted pounds. This year we will find true love. This year we will poop out diamonds and suddenly become irresistible to the opposite sex. Well, most of those resolutions will be abandoned by the end of the week, but one thing that can be said is 2011 should be a great year for movies, especially comic book movies. Even if you are perfect already and don’t have any changes to make in this coming year, you should still be looking forward to the rest of 2011 simply because of these movies.

Thor

We have already seen the trailer for Thor, and it looks amazing. Marvel has had some success with their superhero franchises, most notably with Iron Man and Spider-Man, and it definitely looks like Thor will add to that success. With big names such as Natalie Portman and Anthony Hopkins involved with Thor, it is very easy to be optimistic. Add the fact that Chris Hemsworth looks every inch the petulant but heroic God of Thunder and we should have an exciting movie on our hands.

Captain America: The First Avenger

Captain America: The First Avenger has been somewhat overshadowed by Thor, but it is Captain America who has more pressure to succeed. The reason for this is simple, all these Marvel movies are leading up to an Avengers movie that will feature many Marvel superheroes. As the title of his movie suggests, Captain America is an integral part of the Avengers team. I see no need to worry about the success of Captain America though, seeing Chris Evans battle Nazis as a patriotic super soldier should entertain every red, white, and blue blooded American.

Your Highness

Simply put, Your Highness looks like it will be the funniest movie of 2011. Danny McBride and James Franco form a great comedy duo, as shown briefly in Pineapple Express. It will also help that David Gordon Green, the director of Pineapple Express, will also be directing Your Highness. Sure, this is a crude type of humor, finding comedy in masturbation jokes and foul language. That doesn’t make it less funny, and we will get to see Natalie Portman in a thong. It’s pretty much been decided that whatever movie she is in will become one of the most anticipated movies for that year.

The Hangover 2

In the running for comedy of the year will be The Hangover 2. Movies about guys getting drunk and doing ridiculous things relatively consequence free that we could never get away with in real life are always entertaining. What will make this movie great is the same thing that made the first one hilarious; the cameos. It is rumored that Ken Jeong and Mike Tyson will have repeat appearances, and Liam Neeson and Bill Clinton will be showing up to party as well. While there is controversy about Mel Gibson being dropped from the movie, I think Slick Willy will be plenty entertaining to make up for it.

Super 8

I’m not sure what I can say about Super 8 other than it is being directed by J. J. Abrams and it is about Area 51 in 1979. Those are about the only details of this movie that anyone knows at this point. Despite the lack of information, I dare you to watch this trailer and not agree that it is going to be awesome.

Green Lantern

I will admit that I am biased about Green Lantern. I am automatically assuming that Green Lantern will be awesome for several reason. First, I love comic books and Green Lantern is one of my favorite superheroes. Second, Ryan Reynolds is my man crush. With those two things combined, I can’t imagine anything resulting except for greatness. I am also pretty sure everyone else will enjoy Green Lantern because it is a movie about an intergalactic space cop hunting down alien criminals AKA the best idea anyone has ever had, ever.

Sucker Punch

Zack Snyder has gained a reputation for visually appealing and entertaining movies, and rightly so. Sucker Punch will add to that list of movies. The trailer has shown it will be stunning visually, and considering that it is basically Alice in Wonderland meets foxy boxing I don’t think the entertainment value will be anything to worry about. Any movie about a bunch of attractive and crazy girls trying to bust out of an asylum by fighting dragons, flying planes, and doing backflips in skimpy outfits will be pretty popular.

The Green Hornet

The biggest question about The Green Hornet is how believable Seth Rogen will be as a superhero. The part that people have to understand is that Seth Rogen won’t really be the superhero in the “guy who kicks a lot of ass” sense. Those ass kicking duties will be handled by Jay Chou as Kato, who will deliver many side flip kicks to the top of criminals’ heads. Seth Rogen is just the guy who funds the operation, has his heart in the right place, and will occasionally crack a joke or a bad guy’s skull. If people can accept this, than The Green Hornet will be a very entertaining action comedy. Plus it has the Black Beauty, one of the most awesome cars to ever be invented.

Pixar has been one of the most successful studios since back in 1995 when they released the first Toy Story movie. It seems that every movie they have released has been ridiculously entertaining and brought in enough money to sink one hundred yachts. Pixar has only released eleven movies to date, but each one has been very memorable and brought smiles to the faces of children and, more impressively, their parents. Here are some of the best examples of Pixar movies.

Toy Story

Pixar released Toy Story way back in 1995, and the company couldn’t have had a better debut. Toy Story introduced us to Woody, Buzz, and the rest of the gang. What made Toy Story so successful was the fact that it proved animated movies could be enjoyed by both children and adults. In fact, Toy Story has become one of the best trilogies made. Each movie is fun to watch, but it was the original Toy Story that started it all.

Monsters, Inc.

Monsters, Inc. showed us the world of monsters. They hid in our closets and under our beds not because they wanted to eat us, but because they needed our terrified shrieks to power their cities. This system works well until top scarer Sulley and his friend Mike accidentally bring back a little human girl into the world of monsters. They do their best to protect her from other monsters and discover that a child’s laughter provides much more energy than their screams, prompting a change in monster tactics. The scene where Sulley takes the little girl home and has to say goodbye is one of the most touching in any movie.

Finding Nemo

Finding Nemo was a warning to overbearing parents. If you don’t let your child live their life then they will be kidnapped by Australian scuba divers, meet odd people, and have zany adventures. Of course, this only applies if you are a fish. Even with that moral aside, Finding Nemo was one of the best movies that Pixar has made. Ellen Degeneres’ character of Dory was particularly entertaining, but the best part was finding out that turtles aren’t slow, they’re just going with the flow, bro.

The Incredibles

The Incredibles was made back before superhero movies had started to gain popularity. This was no obstacle for Pixar though, as all they know how to do is make good movies. The Incredibles was somewhat of a parody of the Fantastic Four, and their were many allusions to famous comic book superheroes to please the fanboys. Adding Samuel L. Jackson as the ice powered hero Frozone was a nice touch.

Up

Pixar had a great amount of success with their movie Up. In fact, Up is one of only two animated movies to be nominated for an Academy Award for Best Picture. That is impressive by itself. Up is also one of the most touching movies Pixar has put out. The story follows an old man, Carl Fredricksen, following his dead wife’s last dream while being assisted by a young boy, Russell, trying to earn his Wilderness Explorer badge. Eventually Russell becomes the child Carl could never have with his wife.

5. Jane Seymour – Solitaire

2. Claudine Auger – Domino Derval

Domino Derval was such a sexy character that she was brought in for two movies; first Thunderball and then Never Say Never Again. James Bond simultaneously meets her and saves her from drowning. She repays him by shooting one of his enemies with a spear gun later, and also by looking fantastic in a swimsuit.

James Bond is well know for the quality of the women he beds. There has been so much hotness in his history that it couldn’t be contained to just a single list. Here we have the first installment in the 20 Hottest Bond Girls, counting down from number 20 to 11. It really says something about the James Bond Franchise that a list of 20 hot women doesn’t even cover half of them. Speaking of half uncovered, let’s get this show on the road.

20. Maria Grazia Cucinotta – Cigar Girl

While Cigar Girl had only a very minor role in The World Is Not Enough. She made quite the impression though, with her long legs and murdering ways. She also never gave in to Bonds charms, although it took killing herself to resist.

19. Honor Blackman – Pussy Galore

Pussy Galore is one of the most famous names in the James Bond Franchise, and for good reason. One interesting fact is that G4 star Olivia Munn will only refer to her as Ladyparts Galore.

18. Daniela Bianchi – Tatiana Romanova

Tatiana Romanova plays a pawn and hero in From Russia With Love. She is supposed to kill Bond, but of course he is far too handsome to be killed. If she is a good example of the love in Russia, it’s no wonder those mail order brides are so popular.

17. Eunice Gayson – Sylvia Trench

Eunice Gayson could be considered the first Bond Girl, but she was overshadowed by another. Still, it’s hard to overlook anyone who looks this good.

16. Luciana Paluzzi – Fiona Volpe

Fiona Volpe laughs at James Bond when his magical sex powers don’t make her turn away from crime. Bond gets the last laugh as he uses her to stop a bullet. Game, set, and match.

15. Barbara Bach – Anya Amasova

Anya Amasova plays one in a long line of women who want to kill James Bond, but love him too much to hurt him. In this case she only wants to kill Bond because he killed her previous lover, but she then decides the new model is a definite upgrade.

14. Teri Hatcher – Paris Carver

Teri Hatcher is great at playing a cougar, and that’s exactly what she is as Paris Carver. Her love for Bond outweighs that for her dastardly husband. This ultimately gets her killed, but I think she’d say it was worth it.

13. Denise Richards – Dr. Christmas Jones

Christmas Jones is a shapely 23 year old nuclear physicist with a penchant for short shorts and tight tank tops. I am willing to believe all these things just for Bond’s line: “I thought Christmas only comes once a year”. Pure cinematic gold.

12. Olga Kurylenko – Camille Montes

Camille Montes is on a mission for revenge, and only James Bond can help her. Of course she can’t go around revenging people unless she looks great, but luckily she has that covered. She is also one of the only Bond Girls who didn’t get well acquainted with Bond’s bedspread.

11. Lana Wood – Plenty O’Toole

There is only one thing the can be said about Plenty O’Toole and that is that she had Plenty O’Something alright. It is no surprise Bond gets her back into his hotel room.

That takes care of part one of the 20 Hottest Bond Girls. View the Top 10 Hottest Bond Girls here. As an extra treat, here are some honorable mentions:

Lois Chiles – Dr. Holly Goodhead

Talisa Soto – Lupe Lamora

Britt Ekland-Mary Goodnight

Sophie Merceau – Elektra King

Diana Rigg – Tracy Bond

View the Top 10 Hottest Bond Girls here.

Movies have always been a great opportunity to see some very attractive women. It was figured out very early that the best way to get men to come see a movie is by having violence and beautiful women. It also helps to serve steak and beer in the lobby of the theater, but that is a less common business practice. So while the olden days might have had 5 cent hot dogs and people who read the newspaper, we can agree that every era has their fair share of hotness in the female form.

Audrey Hepburn

Audrey Hepburn is essentially a synonym for beauty. She was ridiculously good looking during her prime and had that rare attribute of aging gracefully. Her slim features are easily recognizable and live on past her death as the standard for beauty. I know I would have spent a week’s wages on a 10 cent ticket to go see Audrey Hepburn in a movie. Pretty much every guy did, and that turned her into a star.

Marilyn Monroe

When you think of the term “sex symbol” the first image that pops into your head probably isn’t fit to write about on a family friendly site such as this. In a close second is Marilyn Monroe. She was sex incarnate. With rumors linking her to such famous men as JFK and her marriage to Joe DiMaggio, it is no surprise that Joe Everyman wanted a piece. Her role in Gentleman Prefer Blondes showed the  way she could use her good looks to do what she wanted, much like she could in life.

Raquel Welch

One Million Years B.C. claimed on the movie poster that “this is the way it was”. Now I’m no history buff, but I am fairly sure that dinosaurs didn’t coexist with humans, and I am also fairly certain that cavewomen were nowhere near as hot as Raquel Welch. She was the reason for the movie’s other tag line: “…discover a savage world whose only law is lust”. After seeing Raquel Welch in her cavelady outfit, I would totally take on a velociraptor.

Sophia Loren

Sophia Loren is the only one of these actresses who has appeared in a movie recently. That is most likely because the only other woman still alive from this list is Raquel Welch. It is interesting to see how Sophia Loren has aged, because even as a woman who has seen many years, you can tell she was a fox in her day. She starred in movies as the love interest of such actors as Clark Gable, Charlton Heston, and Paul Newman. If she was a good enough for them she is definitely good enough for me.

Rita Hayworth

Before Marilyn Monroe came around, Rita Hayworth was the sex symbol of America. Her dance experience gave her moves that people went crazy for. She not only starred in movies with men like Fred Astaire, but became one of the most popular pin-up girls of all time. She was also extremely proud of never doing a nude scene in a movie, much to the disappointment of men all over. She did, however, come close. Ask your grandpa about it, he’ll fill you in.

A lot of men are intimidated by powerful women and others just find them b*tchy.  If you are the former, I can’t help you.  But if you are the ladder, then these are 5 powerful women sweet and feminine enough to make you still feel like a man.

5) Trinity – The Matrix

Why she’s datable: She’s firm but still oh-so soft.  Physically and emotionally.  She has a deep seeded, unshakable faith, yet she still goes with the flow.  She doesn’t try to force anything to happen.

Why she’s a keeper: She embraces the fact that you are the chosen one.  She doesn’t mind that you have responsibilities to the people.  In fact, she digs that about you.  And most importantly, she’s not jumping up in your face acting like she needs to be the chosen one too.  She is Michelle Obama cool.  And that makes you stronger.

4) Padme – Star Wars

Why she’s datable: Padme Amidala is cultured, but also kind and caring enough to not judge you because you aren’t.  She’d show you things that you never thought you’d see and open you up to new experiences.

Why she’s a keeper: In the words of Ne-Yo, “she’s got her own.”  She a busy and prominent senator, but she is still never too busy to spend a intimate night with her man.  She knows where her priorities are.  And that’s with you.

3) Elizabeth Swann – Pirates of the Carribbean

Why she’s datable: Can you say, lady by day, freak by night?  She’s definitely one of those girls with a controlling father who is just waiting to act out.  You should probably be there when she does.

Why she’s a keeper: She would literally go to the ends of the earth for you and despite all of the temptation she feels from Jack Sparrow, she’s always faithful and moral.  Oh, and she’s cool enough to let you go out and do your duty while she holds it down until you get back.

2) Letty – Fast & Furious

Why she’s datable: She hot, she loves cars, probably willing to watch a bit of sports with you before she gets bored and *ahem* tries to divert your attention.  I’m sure you could take her to a game or some other adrenaline pumping activity and she’d have a blast.

Why she’s a keeper: There are not too many women out there who have mastered the skill of leading a man and yet allowing him to lead.  If you don’t know what I’m talking about then you haven’t experienced/mastered it yet.  Letty is that strong.

1) Mrs. Smith – Mr. & Mrs. Smith

Why she’s datable:  Technically she’s not, because she’s married.  But if you were that lucky Mr. Smith than you would have yourself one smoking hot pretend housewife.  And so what she’s pretending, at least she’s trying.  That’s all that really matters.

Why she’s a keeper: Even though everyone around her was screaming that her man was a bad guy and even after it looked like he tried to kill her (which was a misunderstanding we’ve all been through) she still couldn’t bring herself to kill him.  She knew deep down it was all a mistake.  She loved him.  That’s the kind of woman we’d all be lucky to have.

Beaze and all his crazy antics, featured articles and random thoughts are now on twitter @Beazewriter

Abigail Whistler from Blade: Trinity

Buffy The Vampire Slayer

Princess Anna Valerious from Van Helsing