Humor District

Let Me In looks like it just might be the best horror movie released in quite a long time. It has all the elements to make up something truly terrifying, including vampires that don’t sparkle and little kids being creepy. There is nothing more unsettling than creepy kids. This might even be the movie to bring a date to, she’ll want to cuddle when she’s scared. Or he’s scared, it could work for you too, ladies. Read on for some more great reasons to see Let Me In.

Chloe Moretz

Chloe Moretz made her Hollywood debut in Kick-Ass as the deadly Hit-Girl. She did a damn fine job of it, which is very impressive. It is hard to make a little girl believable as a ruthless and efficient killer, but Chloe Moretz pulled it off. At the same time, she still made it clear in some scenes that she was just a little girl. It was a terrific performance, and it showed that she could be a great kid character in movies that aren’t for kids. In Let Me In she will be draining blood for her victims and will no longer be a vigilante. She will still be awesome though.

Cloverfield

Matt Reeves is the director of Let Me In. He also happens to be the director of Cloverfield. Cloverfield managed to be an entertaining and scary movie despite the fact that the monster is rarely seen. What Matt Reeves showed with Cloverfield is he knows how to create truly scared characters without a whole lot of need for blood and gore. It relies on the pacing and the build up of suspense, just like Let Me In will. If he mixes in that blood and gore, Let Me In has a chance at being great.

John Lindqvist’s Novel

If you didn’t know, Let Me In is based off of a novel by John Lindqvist, also titled Let Me In. It is a great read, I would go so far as to recommend going out and getting the book before you go see the movie. It is also the type of book that translates well into a movie, as proven by the Swedish film Let the Right One In. Let the Right One In was a good movie, but now that Matt Reeves has seen that movie, he knows how to make John Lindqvist’s novel into an even better movie.

Kodi Smit-McPhee

Kodi Smit-McPhee, like Chloe Moretz, is a young actor who has proven himself to be quite capable. You might remember him from the movie The Road as the son of Viggo Mortensen. In The Road Smit McPhee had to deal with cannibals, intense cold, and generally being one of the last human beings alive. Dealing with the little vampire girl next door shouldn’t be any problem for him at all.

Elias Koteas

There is one reason why I am excited about Elias Koteas being in Let Me In. He is Casey Jones from the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movies. It is just a perfect bit of nostalgia for my inner nerd. For those of you who didn’t have childhoods, Casey Jones was the guy who wore a hockey mask and used various sports equipment to hand out his painful style of vigilante justice. Koteas is playing a policeman in Let Me In, but he will be having a much harder time handing out any justice to vampire children. Where are the turtles when you need them?

Popularity: 11% [?]

There is something inherently scary about little kids and their blank eyed stares. Maybe it is because when kids are small they have no moral compass until it is taught to them. From the ages of one to five, children are plotting your death every time you refuse to give them a cookie. Luckily they are too small and weak to go through with these plans. Except for these kids. They will destroy you unless you let them watch an extra 30 minutes of television before bedtime, and there would be nothing you could do about it.

Hit-Girl – Kick-Ass

Chloe Moretz did an amazing job in Kick-Ass as Hit-Girl. She eviscerated many criminals and those who escaped her sword got a bullet in the head. She also held her own against a grown man in hand to hand combat. What that adds up to is a terrifying little child. She is also the perfect size to reach vulnerable places, a particularly sobering thought when she has weapons. Hit-Girl is definitely one of the most violent kids we have seen in movies for a while.

Damien – The Omen

What is creepier than a little kid with a blank eyed stare? A little kid with a blank eyed stare and supernatural powers who happens to be the son of the devil. Yeah, that is not a good combination, at least not if you want to continue living. If you get in his way your life expectancy lowers considerably. The worst part is people frown upon the act of trying to kill him when you find out he is demon spawn, after all, he still looks like a little kid. Beating up small children is not the most accepted of hobbies in these parts. You are just forced to sit back and watch him push pregnant ladies down the stairs.

The Children of the Corn

Now we have what is basically an entire town full of Damiens. Isaac and Malachai are the ringleaders of the children, who sacrifice all of the adults to their demonic god so they get a good corn harvest. Yeah, for some reason the kids care about corn, which in my opinion makes them scarier. After they kill the adults they hang them up in obscene ritualistic ways, making them perhaps the most depraved kids in movies.

3 Ninjas

In order to make sure you can sleep tonight we will end with some less terrifying children. They will still beat you up, but only if you are evil. The 3 ninjas vary in size and skill, but they have surprisingly good strategy when bringing down full grown men. They attack from different directions to keep you off balance and aren’t afraid to go for cheap shots. Hey, at least they aren’t trying to feed your soul to hungry demons or anything. I still wouldn’t want to babysit any of the kids on this list.

Popularity: 2% [?]

Roger Ebert is still yet to review The Expendables. Grab our RSS Feed to be notified when he does, and we’ve published a few Expendable trailers which you can view here.

Now I don’t mean to use any harsh language, but Roger Ebert has proven himself to be a fuddy duddy. A 1/5 rating for Kick-Ass? Really? Now I hate to be the writer to make all the “Kick-Ass lived up to the name” references, but it can’t be helped, Kick-Ass truly did kick ass. It is just baffling that a comic book movie that can be legitimately compared to The Dark Knight and Iron Man in terms of quality would receive the lowest rating possible.

Let’s go over Mr. Ebert’s review. He seems to be thrown off by the high levels of violence in Kick-Ass, especially the violence by 11 year old Chloe Grace Moretz as Hit-Girl. Ebert seemed particularly offended that Hit-Girl got the crap beat out of her by a grown man. It was, admittedly, a little uncomfortable to watch a grown man pummel a little girl, but it fit in with the semi-realistic nature of the movie. Small children do not have the mass to fight fully grown gangsters in hand to hand combat. Look at this image from the Kick-Ass graphic novel and tell me the violence was not to be expected.

Yet, Mr. Ebert had no problem whatsoever with the over the top violence and gore in Kill Bill, even though that featured a young girl in a schoolgirl outfit named Gogo Gabari fighting with a spiked ball on a chain who was violently killed. In fact, Ebert gave Kill Bill a rating of 4/5.

Now I’m not trying to bring down Kill Bill, I thoroughly enjoyed both movies, I am just pointing out that Roger Ebert’s stance on violence against the youth seems to be a little uneven. It seems that Mr. Ebert is more likely to give somebody like Quentin Tarantino some leeway in reviews, while coming down hard on lesser known comic properties. This is truly a shame, as Kick-Ass could be starting a trend of great movies based off of less mainstream comics with movies like The Losers and Scott Pilgrim coming out.

Kick-Ass did not try and hide the nature of the movie. It’s name is Kick-Ass, of course there is going to be violence, especially since it is a semi-realistic view of what would happen if somebody dressed up as a superhero and tried to fight crime. They would most likely get their ass kicked. Even the trailer opened up with a man dressed in a falcon-like costume falling to his death. Kick-Ass did a great job mixing in humor into what on the outside seems like a pretty bleak world. Even Mr. Ebert had to admit that the movie started off hilariously. I was lucky enough to attend an advanced screening of Kick-Ass, and the entire audience was reacting to every scene. Almost everything that happened in the movie elicited some sort of reaction from the crowd, whether it was laughter, gasps, or appreciative oohs. The end, which Mr. Ebert claimed was dark and made him sad, still got a great positive reaction from the audience, and nobody could stop talking about Kick-Ass on their way out of the theater. I believe that is a far larger sign of a great movie than a review by Roger Ebert. In the end, a movie that draws that kind of positive reaction from the general audience is sure to be remembered as a good one. If you are interested in seeing a good movie, I highly recommend Kick-Ass, but be warned, it features violence and strong language, hence the “R” rating. Duh. Humor District gives Roger Ebert a rating of Looks Like a Woman and Kick-Ass a rating of 4/5.

Popularity: 6% [?]

If you haven’t been informed already, the upcoming movie Kick-Ass looks like it is going to kick ass. The trailers have been hilarious and I am very much looking forward to this movie coming out. In the meantime, I will have to make due with the 4 new Kick-Ass movie posters that have been released. The first is a fairly standard movie poster with the main cast striking a pose. The next 3 posters are awesome, resembling old war time posters. The Hit-Girl poster is based off the famous Rosie the Riveter posters of WWII. That’s some female empowerment right there. The Red Mist poster is a recruitment poster, asking for all of us to grab our costumes and go fight crime. The there’s the poster for the titular character, Kick-Ass. Much like the famous Uncle Sam recruitment poster, Kick-Ass is reaching out to us to defend our country. This can only be described as inspirational. Enjoy the posters.

Popularity: 2% [?]