ROUND 1: Northeast Region

ROUND 1: Northwest Region

ROUND 1: Southeast Region

ROUND 1: Southwest Region

ROUND 2: East Region

ROUND 2: West Region

SWEET 16: East Region

SWEET 16: West Region

ELITE 8

FINAL FOUR: East Region

FINAL FOUR: West Region

Click image to see an enlarged bracket.

It’s the ultimate showdown between two guys you’d never want to see in a dark alley.  The Joker climbed his way through some pretty stiff competition in Chucky and Freddy Krueger, two men who could’ve easily won any other bracket.  Meanwhile the Terminator buzz-sawed his way through much weaker Cinderella’s in Gordon Gekko and the Creeper, but none of that matters now.  It’s one on one.  Let’s get it on!

VS.

(1) Joker – The Dark Knight

(2) Terminator – Terminator

Battle: This is definitely an odd couple matchup.  We’re comparing Apples to Oranges, and that’s what so cool.  The Joker is evil for evil’s sake while the Terminator is evil with a purpose.  The Joker seems to take the time to scheme and plan while the terminator is literally a killing machine.

Neither of them has a soul.

The Terminators use our own technology against us and hunt down human beings much like how exterminators spray coach roaches.  Only imagine the exterminator tearing down the walls to gas their nests and staying up all night to guarding their traps.  That’s what the Terminators do to the human race.

The Joker could blow up a school bus full of children just as easily as he could shoot a full grown man.  Nobody is innocent or immune to his wrath.  He wakes up every morning thinking about how to rain chaos on the city of Gotham and then goes to sleep at night without losing a wink of sleep.  The caveat though is this: the Terminator does all that, only he doesn’t need to sleep.

Click image to see an enlarged bracket.

The Most Evil Movie Villain of All Times:

(2) Terminator – The Terminator

If I were walking down the street, this is the guy I would hate to see ahead of me.  You may be smarter than Leatherface, stronger than Catherine Tramell and quicker than Jason Voorhees, but you just know that if you see the Terminator coming your way, you’re about as good as dead.  There is no begging, no bargaining, no fighting and no running.  If the Terminator wants you dead and you have anything short of a bazooka, you’re dead.  And truth be told, that will only delay the inevitable.

The Terminators only mission is to destroy life.  Period.  He doesn’t need humans to amuse him.  He doesn’t even need the earth to sustain him.  He doesn’t want revenge, he doesn’t want to feel better, he doesn’t want to be soothed.  He has no other motive than destruction.  That’s pure evil.  That’s the most evil movie villain ever imagined.

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ROUND 1: Northeast Region

ROUND 1: Northwest Region

ROUND 1: Southeast Region

ROUND 1: Southwest Region

ROUND 2: East Region

ROUND 2: West Region

SWEET 16: East Region

Click to see an enlarged bracket.

The truck that is Gordon Gekko just keeps steam rolling the competition.  His latest victim is none other than the legendary, liver-eating Hannibal.  Which juggernaut is going down on this side of the sweet 16?  Well…

VS.

(1) Freddy Krueger – A Nightmare on Elm Street

(4) Leatherface – Texas Chainsaw Massacre

Battle:  If you squinted really hard it’d be easy to confuse Freddy Krueger with the devil, but this competition is about more than looks.  Leatherface took people apart just so he could have a face (or a different face).  And as far as we know Leatherface was human.  But at the end of the day, Leatherface was driven to evil because he was teased as a child.  He was an odd child.  And there were plenty of signs that he didn’t exactly grasp what he was doing.  He was a deranged and disfigured Lennie.  Freddy knew exactly what he was doing, before and after death.  That takes a bit more evil.

Winner: Freddy Krueger

VS.

(2) Jason Voorhees – Friday the 13th

(3) Catherine Tramell – Basic Instinct

Battle: Jason’s weakness is that he only kills people who wonder into Camp Crystal lake.  I mean all you have to do to avoid him is pass on the camping trip.  His strength however is that he is a mass murderer who slaughters everyone who packs a sleeping bag like a stuffed pig.  Catherine Tramell’s weakness is that she is lacking on the mass portion of her murders.  I mean she can only kill a few people at a time and even then she has to be very selective.  I mean if a guy could keep it in his pants, he’d see right through her and be able to subdue her.  She’s not very big.  But in the grand scheme of things…how many guys could actual keep it in their pants?

Winner: Catherine Tramell.

VS.

(7) General Thade – Planet of the Apes

(11) Max Cady – Cape Fear

Battle: Max Cady is probably the most disgusting rapist in this tournament, but General Thade is probably the most evil dictator in this tournament.  However, Max had tunnel vision.  He spent all his time trying to set up one man.  Trying to break one man.  And his resume isn’t all that impressive.  If you are going to dedicate yourself to one person, you’d better terrorize the hell out of them.  General Thade however, knew how to conquer an entire race of people.  He didn’t just slaughter them, he beat them down and made them feel like they were nothing.  He made them believe they were nothing and deserved to be swatted down like in significant flies.

Winner: General Thade.

VS.

(1) Joker – The Dark Knight

(4) Chucky – Child’s Play

Battle: You know, I would just like to lock these two characters in a room with a radio mic and listen to the conversation they would have.  It would have to be satellite radio of course, but it would be the most entertaining radio show ever.  But you don’t get points here for talking evil in this competition.  Joker saw the big picture and dedicated his life to just f—in’ sh– up.  That’s it.  No rhyme or reason.  He just wanted to f— sh– up and anyone who happened to catch his eye became the victim.  Chucky on the other hand spent all his time looking for a body.  He wasn’t really killing people just for the joy of killing people.  He was killing people get a body.  He was laying low most of the time posing as a doll and then coming out at night.  He wasn’t trying to terrify people, he went out of his way so they’d never see it coming.  Joker wouldn’t do that.

Winner: Joker

Click image to see an enlarged bracket.

NEXT UP, THE ELITE 8!—->

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ROUND 1: Northeast Region

ROUND 1: Northwest Region

ROUND 1: Southeast Region

ROUND 1: Southwest Region

ROUND 2: East Region

ROUND 2: West Region

Click here to see an enlarged bracket.

Max Cady proved to a little more psycho then the Psycho Norman Bates, but everything else in round 2 west region went pretty much as planned.  So we are do for a shake up here in the sweet 16?  Let’s get right to it.

VS.

(2) Terminator – Terminator

(14) The Creeper – Jeepers Creepers

Battle: Neither one seems easily stoppable.  If you cut up the Creeper, he’ll just eat someone’s limbs and then his will grow back.  If you blow up the terminator, his pieces will keep coming after you.  However, the creeper seems to only take what he needs.  If the terminator had the opportunity to take Mac and his sister, he would’ve and kidnapped her and used her for experiments.  Or worse.

Winner: Terminator

VS.

(9) Castor Troy -Face/Off

(12) Bullseye – Daredevil

Battle: Once again Bullseye faces off against a man who would’ve employed him.  But while Bullseye killed for assignments and occasionally just because he can, Castor Troy killed just to watch the panic and terror.  Castor Troy was a bon-a-fide terrorist, and what’s more evil than that?

Winner: Castor Troy

VS.

(1) Hannibal – Silence of the Lambs

(12) Gordon Gekko – Wall Street

Battle: “The Destroyer” Gordon Gekko vs. Hannibal “the Stomach” Lecter.  I know that greed is evil.  I know that wall street is evil.  And I know that Gordon is the face of both evils.  Gordon Gekko and the current economic climate (not to mention that I just finished watching Capitalism: A love-story) all make it incredibly hard not to pass Gordon Gekko into the next round.  I mean you have to have absolutely no conscious to do some of the things he did and not bat an eye.  Then again, Hannibal, well…he cooked a guys brains and fed it to him.  That’s some crazy sh–.  But at the end of the day, Hannibal was somewhat controlled.  He could even bring himself to be “helpful” to the police if it suited his motives.  Help the police?  That’s not evil.  Hannibal was never even the man bad guy in his own movies.  Lame.  If you can’t even be the worst villain in your own movie then I don’t know what you are.

Winner: Gordon Gekko

VS.

(3) Damien – The Omen

(10) the White Witch – Chronicles of Narnia

Battle:  Hmm…what if Damien came to Narnia?  Could he take over Narnia?  Could he out-evil the witch?  I know the White Witch did a lot of cold things things, but here’s the thing: not to be racist or nationalist or species-ist…whatever, but the White Witch didn’t really terrorize humans.  She didn’t even really terrorize earth.  At least not our realm.  That’s going to hurt her in this competition.  I don’t really care what happens to talking beavers (don’t giggle).  Damien on the other did his best to destroy humans and earth.  Or send us all to hell.  And he almost succeeded.  It took Jesus Christ to bring him down.  Jesus Christ.  Are you kidding me?  When Jesus has to come back to stop you, that’s f—in’ evil (sorry Lord).

Winner:  Damien

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NEXT UP, SWEET 16: WEST REGION!—->

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ROUND 1: Northeast Region

ROUND 1: Northwest Region

ROUND 1: Southeast Region

ROUND 1: Southwest Region

ROUND 2: East Region

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Darth Vader and Michael Myers took surprising falls in the east regions second round series and Damien and Gordon Gekko are just getting warmed up.  Who will move closer to hell in this region?  Let’s get it on!

VS.

(4) Leatherface – Texas Chainsaw Massacre

(12) Cruella DeVil – 101 Dalmatians

Battle: Cruella had a good run but let’s face it, she’d never be a real threat to you or anyone you know.  You could run into her on the street and what’s she’s gonna do, take your dog?  If she really wanted to hurt somebody she’d have killed those dalmatian lovers and stole their dogs.  If you even try to drive down Leatherface’s street he’s going to kill you.

Winner: Leatherface

VS.

(1) Joker – The Dark Knight

(8) Simon Pheonix – Demolition Man

Battle: The Joker and Simon Phoenix were after the same thing: chaos.  Joker killed city officials, turned a hero DA is a psychopath and tried to blow up two (literal) boat loads of people.  Simon Pheonix…killed city officials.  So while I totally Wesley Snipes would beat Heath Ledger’s ass any day of the week, his resume comes up a little short.

Winner: Joker

VS.

(3) Catherine Tramell – Basic Instinct

(11) Clarence Boddicker – Robocop

Battle: Clarence Boddicker was really just out for a good time.  Should a cop get in his way — or anyone for that matter — he took pleasure in blowing them away.  Still, his objective was to party.  Catherine Tramell seemed to go out looking for trouble.  She wanted to twist people to her will and then kill them.  That’s some evil sh–.

Winner: Catherine Tramell

VS.

(2) Jason Voorhees – Friday the 13th

(7) Alonzo – Training Day

Battle: Alonzo was chasing power and respect which most would say is the root of all evil, but in a way he was just trying to restore order.  His order, but still order.  Jason Voorhees was a scared little boy looking for his mommy, but he was demented enough to believe that anyone who entered his camp was his enemy and deserved to die.  Jason had more demons.

Winner: Jason Voorhees

VS.

(4) Chucky – Child’s Play

(12) Peyton Flanders – The Hand that Rocked the Craddle

Battle: It’s the baby doll vs. the babysitter.  I think it’s safe to say that Peyton isn’t going to be rocking Chucky’s cradle anytime soon.  Yea she killed one guy and tried to take over a family, but let’s pretend she succeeded.  She’d have done anything to protect her family, but she wouldn’t go out of her way to hurt people.  If Chucky possessed a new body, his evil would know no bounds.

Winner: Chucky

VS.

(3) Norman Bates – Psycho

(11) Max Cady – Cape Fear

Battle:  Here’s the deal with Norman Bates: he (and his mother) just wanted to be left alone.  They could have stayed in that crappy motel for years and not interact with anyone.  Evil contained.  Max Cady had an itch he just had to scratch.  An itch for rape, if not murder to.  He’d never just sit alone and let it fester.

Winner: Max Cady

VS.

(1) Freddy Kruger – A Nightmare of Elm Street

(8) T-1000 – Terminator 2: Judgment Day

Battle: Just stop for a minute and imagine this battle for real.  Amazing right?  Well in terms of evil, the liquid terminators only objective was to assassinate (I think he is important enough to warrant the term) John Connor.  He didn’t really kill anyone he didn’t have to.  He wasn’t just poking bystanders in the eye with his liquid daggers.  Freddy would’ve.

Winner: Freddy Kruger

VS.

(7) General Thade – Planet of the Apes

(15) Maleficent – Sleeping Beauty

Battle: Hmm…General Thade kept slaves.  Maleficent never had any slaves.  Maleficent tried to kill a baby and then eat the prince that came to save the grown up baby.  General Thade would certainly kill a human baby and anyone who tried to stop him.  Isn’t it ironic that Maleficent’s “Cinderella” story dies here.

Winner: General Thade

Click image to see an enlarged bracket.

SWEET 16: EAST REGION AHEAD —->

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ROUND 1: Northeast Region

ROUND 1: Northwest Region

ROUND 1: Southeast Region

Click image to see an enlarged bracket.

There weren’t many upsets in the Southeast region, but we did see Damien rise up and announce that he is here to claim the throne that is rightfully his (I mean he is the Antichrist).  Will anyone in the Southwest region be able to give him a run for his money?  Find out below.

VS.

(1) Freddy Kruger – Nightmare of Elm Street: Guts children with a glove made of scissors.

(16) Henry Evans – the Good Son: Killed his neighbor’s pets with a homemade crossbow.

Winner: Freddy never faced a child like Henry before I can tell you that much.  This child Macaulay Culkin won’t scare as easy as Freddy’s typical drugged up teenage victims.  Henry was a pure sociopath, no doubt about it and would have pulled off the upset against any other supernatural killer…but Freddy Kruger was just as sociopathic when he was human.  Once Freddy was given supernatural powers, he took it to a whole new level.  Freddy wins.

VS.

(4) Leatherface – Texas Chainsaw Massacre: If you ever needed to cut up a log, he’s your guy.

(13) Sauron – Lord of the Rings: Made a nasty ring that turns everyone into a douchebag.

Winner: Look, I’m not even going to pretend that I sat through 9+ hours of LOTR’s, nor that I’d understand its confusing twists and turns if I had.  Leatherface chopped body parts and made an entire nation shiver every time they heard a chainsaw rev to life.  Leatherface advances.  Next!

VS.

(3) Catherine Tramell – Basic Instinct: the ultimate femme fatale who murdered men with an ice pick.

(14) Patrick Bateman – American Psycho: the ultimate whack job who murdered people with an axe.

Winner: Christain Bale was truly a psycho – if not American – but at the end of the day who knows whether he really splattered anybody or if he just fantasized about it.  I know that’s the gateway behavior (I watch Criminal Minds), but please Patrick…man up and do something about it already!  No way does he compare to a legged legend.  Sharon Stone moves on.

VS.

(7) Alonzo – Training Day: A murderer with a badge.

(10) Alex - A Clockwork Orange: A home invaded with a fetish for sleeping wives.

Winner: Alonzo shakes down thugs like Alex on a daily basis and he’d have no problem out evil-ing this little creep.  Denzel Washington wins.

VS.

(6) John Doe – Se7en: Reminded the world of the seven deadly sins by putting a cop’s wife’s head in a box.

(11) Clarence Boddicker – Robocop: Notorious cop killer.

Winner: Let’s see.  One guy blew a cops apart piece by piece and the other guy destroyed a cop mentally piece by piece.  It’s brain vs. brawn here, but in terms of sheer evil…I have to give it to the robo-killer.  He’d never commit suicide to punish himself.

VS.

(5) Lex Luthor – Superman: A criminal mastermind who tried to sink California.

(12) Cruella DeVil – 101 Dalmatians: an heiress furrier who tried to skin 101 dalmatians just to make a coat.

Winner: As much as I’d like to stick up for California, the truth is that the movie versions of Lex Luthor are all genius and short on the evil.  Cruella DeVil was just as rich and if you asked me who I’d be most afraid to meet face to face, it’d have to be DeVil.

VS.

(8) T-1000 – Terminator 2: Judgment Day: the liquid terminator famous for stabbing his victims with ice pick hands.

(9) O-Ren Ishii – Kill Bill: Notorious for slicing and dicing her victims with katana swords.

Winner: The T-1000 was creator for the specific purpose of assassination, but some would say the same for O-Ren Ishii.  O-Ren was a bad girl, but once again, the code of thieves comes back to bite another villain on the ass.  T-1000 didn’t bargain, hesitate or apologize.  The liquid terminator shuffles on to round 2.

VS.

(2) Jason Voorhees – Friday the 13th: A machete wielding ex-camper in a hockey mask.

(15) Derek Vinyard – American History X: A white supremacist that curb stomps black people.

Winner: A lot of people would say that racist people are the most evil people in the world, but I’d argue that they aren’t evil.  They are just cowards, who attack what they fear.  Jason Voorhees was afraid of no one.  Jason wins.

Click to see an enlarged bracket.

Next up, ROUND 2!—->

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ROUND 1: Northeast Region

ROUND 1: Northwest Region

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We’ve already witnessed what will probably be the biggest upset of the tournament when Maleficent bested the legendary Dracula.  Could anything else top that?  See below:

VS.

(7) Anton Chigurh – No Country for Old Men: Notorious for his captive bolt pistol.

(10) White Witch – Chronicles of Narnia: She murdered a god-like lion and then wore his mane into battle against his people.

Winner: Anton was a nasty son-of-a-b—-, but consider this.  Anton wasn’t pure evil, the man was just driven.  Indifferent.  He even had a freaking code that would’ve allowed Brolin to save his wife.  Compassion is not evil.  The White Witch at the buzzer.

VS.

(2) The Wicked Witch of the West – Wizard of Oz/the Wiz: She cut the king of pop Michael Jackson in half.

(15) Sheriff of Nottingham – Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves: An evil dictator that canceled Christmas.

Winner: The Sheriff of Nottingham knows his witches, but there is no way this witch would submit to his will.  She’s terrorized an entire fictional city in her own right.  But as much as I’d like to see a witches duel in the next round, the Wicked Witch of the West wasn’t really “evil” she was just drunk with revenge for her sister.  The greedy Sheriff was corrupt to the bone.

VS.

(5) The Predator – Predator: An unflinching alien hunter.

(12) Bullseye – Daredevil: An unflinching Irish assassin.

Winner: Both are noted for hunting down their targets and blowing them away.  Both tend to enjoy the thrill of the hunt more than the profit.  Both tend to get fixated on targets they fail to kill.  So what’s the difference?  Well the Predator draws the line at killing children and pregnant women, while Bullseye’s silenced an old lady with a peanut.  That’s evil.  Bullseye’s from long range!

VS.

(8) Regan – The Exorcist: A 12 year-old possessed by — possibly — the devil himself.

(9) Castor Troy – Face/Off: A criminal possessed by a cop.

Winner: Okay, so again, Regan wasn’t really evil at all.  And if she were good bad enough to replace the devil, she wouldn’t have had to have been possessed by him to do evil.  What boss wants to do the work for his employee?  But Castor Troy still has to earn his spot.  He shot a little boy.  That will do.

VS.

(3) Damien thorn – The Omen: He is the actual son of the devil, dubbed the Antichrist.

(12) Jimmy Bones – Bones: The ghost of Snoop Dogg with revenge on his mind.

Winner: I mean Damien is the son of the devil, so he is actually created for this tournament.  But he was also a confused little boy and not really sold on the whole “evil destiny” thing.  However, Jimmy Bones didn’t really kill — or at least target — anyone he did not have a beef with, so Damien moves on.

VS.

(1) Darth Vader – Star Wars: Destroyed whole planets.

(16) Daniel Plainview – There Will Be Blood: He beat a man to death with a bowling pin.

Winner: Sure Darth Vader kill a lot of people, but they meant nothing to him in the first place.  Daniel Plainview killed one fake son and tormented the other.  Then again, Darth Vader, choked his wife, sliced his mentor, chopped off the hand of his son and tortured his daughter.  Darth wins.

VS.

(4) Khan – Star Trek: He stuck eels into people’s ears to control their minds.

(13) Kingpin – Daredevil: He stuck roses in his victims pockets to let them know they were going to die.

Winner: This is interesting because neither villain was shy about getting their hands dirty, but in the end it’s like this: for the Kingpin, if it don’t make dollars it don’t make sense.  For Khan, well…vengeance and chaos was the goal.  Khan wins.

VS

(6) Nurse Ratched – One Flew Over the Cukoos Nest: She was the inmate running the asylum.

(11) Kevin – Sin City: a serial killer that ate his victims and hung their heads on his wall.

Winner: Wow.  Nurse Ratchet picked on the mentally challenged.  Kevin picked on prostitutes.  Most people have a soft spot for the mental and a hard…nevermind.  If I had to say who was more likely to turn over a new leaf of righteousness, it’d have to be Nurse Ratchet.  Kevin, please pass go into round two.

Results:

Click image to see an enlarged bracket.

SOUTHWEST REGION AHEAD —->

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ROUND 1: Northeast Region

Click image to see an enlarged bracket.

Only 8 matchups into the tournament and we already have surprises.  Not only did the Creeper (Jeepers Creepers) come out of nowhere and take down Jack Nicholson’s famous characters from the Shining, but we also had Gordon Gekko and the current economy redefine what it means to be evil.  What can we expect in the Northwest region?  Let’s find out.

VS.

(1) The Joker – the Dark Knight: Burned down a warehouse with Batman’s girl inside after making him believe he could save her.

(16) Bricktop – Snatch: ordered a house burned down with someone’s mother inside.

Winner: This is a blow out.  Joker by a mile.  Bricktop ordered a lot of stuff, but he did nothing.  He’s lucky to be invited to this dance.

VS.

(7) General Thade – Planet of the Apes: Enslaves the entire race of man.

(10) Ghostface – Scream: Stabbed dozens of horny teens to avenge his scorned mother.

Winner: The scream team (remember there were two) terrorized a small little town in the boonies.  General Thade enslaved and terrorized all of humankind, even killing his own apes if they stood in his way.  General Thade gets the nod.

VS.

(5) Jigsaw – Saw: Locked people into deadly traps and watched them torture themselves attempting to escape.

(12) Peyton Flanders – The Hand that Rocked the Cradle: Locked someone else’s baby in a room and breastfed him.

Winner:  This is a battle of the psychological villains.  Both were triggered by a tragic past, but Peyton Flanders has a slight edge because she tormented people and then did her own dirty work to keep it secret.  Jigsaw never killed his victims.  He was a coward.  Upset.  Peyton wins!

VS.

(8) Simon Pheonix – Demonlition Man: Notorious for his incredibly evil haircut.

(9) Headless Horeman – Sleepy Hollow: Notorious for his incredibly evil head cuts.

Winner: Interestingly enough both men were mentally controlled by a rich snob.  the difference is that Simon Pheonix couldn’t have been happier causing destruction and mayhem while the Headless Horseman just wanted to rest in the afterlife.  Advantage Simon Phoenix.

VS.

(4) Chucky – Child’s Play: A creepy old man, pretending to be a child so he can get inside a little boy’s body.

(13) Ivan Drago – Rocky IV: Beat Carl Weathers to death and said, “if he dies, he dies.”

Winner: Drago was a mean mutha f—–, but he didn’t intend to murder Rocky’s friend, he was just cold as ice when it happened.  Chucky is one evil son-of-a-b—-.  Next!  Chucky wins.

VS.

(3) Norman Bates – Psycho: Owns a motel in the middle of nowhere and murdered the woman who dared to stay the night.

(14) Alex Forrest – Fatal Attraction: She boiled a f— rabbit.  Alive.

Winner: Who’s the bigger psycho?  Well Norman Bates became his mother and killed multiple people while Alex Forrest…boiled a rabbit.  This isn’t a PETA contest.  Bates wins.  I mean the title of his movie is Psycho people.

VS.

(6) Tyler Durden – Fight Club: He set himself up to have his balls chopped off.

(11) Max Cady – Cape Fear: Bit the face off a woman he was raping.

Winner: What would Tyler Durden do in this competition?  Not a damn thing.  His rage was against the machine, not the people.  His terror wasn’t terror at all.  Max Cady bite the face off a lady he was raping.  That’s f—in’ evil.  Max Cady moves on.

VS.

(2) Dracula – Brom Stoker’s Dracula: Duh.  Murders his victims by draining their blood then curses them to become vampires.

(15) Maleficent – Sleeping Beauty: Cursed a baby to prick her finger and die.

Winner: It’s the battle of the supernaturally scary, but the question is who did the most evil?  On one hand Dracula has killed more people than he could count, but it was out of hunger and he seems capable of love and compassion.  Maleficent may not have killed anyone on record, but she only loves herself, everyone else is expendable.

…

I’m really torn.

…

Wow.

…

My gut says that Maleficent’s heart is blacker.  Holy smokes.  Maleficent wins.

Click image to see an enlarged bracket.

SOUTHEAST REGION AHEAD —->

Beaze and all his crazy antics, featured articles and random thoughts are now on twitter @Beazewriter